Destiny

Quarantine with the Destiny Gang

Content of the article: "Quarantine with the Destiny Gang"

SIVA has emerged in a new strain that is airborne and contact based and the Guardians are asked to go into Quarantine while the Traveller lets out a vanilla scented sigh while it has to deal with this shit

Let's see who you’re stuck in a house with for the next few months

  • Zavala: Since Guardian activities are cancelled he is a lot more lenient than usual, you find out he enjoys knitting and crochet work, he even knitted you a little sweater for you and Little Light, you also find out he has an interest in old airplane safety videos from the golden age, a bit strange Zavala but whatever floats your boat

  • Ikora Rey: Fortunately she has years and years' worth of old books for you both to read and a seemingly never ending supply of fresh coffee for you both to enjoy, your brain grows thicc from knowledge due to the obscene amount of books you have been reading, and things have awakened within you because you found her HIDDEN Doujinshi section

  • Lord Saladin: It’s pretty lonely and upon Felwinter Peak, not much to do besides play with the Wolfos and do various board game activities with Saladin, though you end up using your ghosts to contact Shaxx and Saint to play a D&D campaign where Shaxx is a Murderhobo and Saint is an OC called “Dickman Turbofist”

  • Ana Bray: She’s still pretty bummed out about Rasputin, you gently brush her hair and tell her everything will be okay, after all we stopped SIVA, Oryx and his Crotchlets, stepped into a-. Before you finish your sentence she gives you a big old hunter hug and tells you how much she appreciates you, leaving you happy and full of smiles, she also shows you her Mecha Anime collection which she has an alarming amount of, she lets you rest your head on her soft thighs while you watch them.

  • Banshee: Keeps forgetting he’s supposed to stay inside, you have to keep reminding the old coot but it’s okay since you two build weapons together, some of which are blatantly against Vanguard Rules, but no one has to know that do they 😉

  • Eris Morn: You have to gently shake her every time she has a Crota flavored Nightmare, other than that you surprisingly find out she likes anime, like, she has probably the world's largest collection of Golden Age Anime on her 100TB HDD, You ask her who best girl is, the answer she gives sends a chill down your spine and puts fingertips on the surface of your mind

  • Emperor Calus: You basically have a planet to walk around and do shit in, Calus let's you use the Menargerie for keeping your gains up, and he always wants to go Vex Bowling with you, but you decline every time because you are scared as to what those words mean

  • The Drifter: You enter his ship's living quarters expecting the worse, and you were right, unflushed toilets, rotten food on the sofa, 100% completed Netflix speedrun, a dead guardian in the closet you don't ask questions about, the full shebang, although it was a pretty baller time when you got drunk on toilet wine and punched several taken in the jugular

  • Mara Sov: Her appearances to you before betray your time in Quarantine with her, from what you thought was a elegant and divine queen turns out to be kind of a slob and soft person, always demanding head pats and pizza while watching her favorite Cute Guardians doing Cute things animes.

  • Uldren Sov: You are stuck with this monster, you can feel your hatred bubbling inside you, but this calms when he comes up to you in tears not knowing why people hate him, you too realize he was not the man he once was, he is a scared, lonely, timid young thing, you comfort him by pouring him a beer and tell him stories about your past adventures

  • Lord Shaxx: Despite being the human version of a Coffee Addict Hyperactive Megaphone, you find out that Shaxx outside of the crucible is a rather bashful and shy person, you catch him writing texts to Mara Sov then deleting them when he gets too shy, this is in stark contrast to the meltdown he has in the Crucible, you find this both kind of cute and kind of scary.

  • Cayde 6: Cayde is thrilled he gets to spend a few months chilling with his favorite Guardian in the whole wide world, You find out he and Amanda share an apartment to help pay for it, you two stay up late playing Co-Op Halo, Mario, Sonic, any game you can name on his emulator and PC, drinking your fill and eating tasty nachos and ramen, although Cayde realizes you and Amanda are now in the same apartment, and he knows you have a hard crush on her, he is going to exploit this to it's extreme for his entertainment and to send it to the Vanguard group chat

  • Tess: Keeps ordering stuff of TravellerBay and you keep cancelling the order because they cost way too much shipping, even so Fenchurch keeps sending shipments much to your great anger

  • Master Rahool: You find his apartment to be seemingly empty at first, but you hit the wrong light switch one time and find a hidden room full of all those Exotics that "rolled" into legendarys, all those godrolls that were Almost God rolls for you, Rahool is nowhere to be seen afterwards, but you have an army of Gjallerhorns so nobody is going to mess with you, even the darkness ships yeeted when hearing about this

  • Hawthorne: Her place of living is a lovely little cottage in the woods overlooking a forest, you and her hunt for food every day, take out Deer, wake up the bears, and word on the street is you cook them for your meal

  • Asher: Is a complete Karen and clean freak, will burst at you for sitting on the sofa the wrong way or eating without a bib, you and him play Jeopardy on his SNES and he keeps muttering impossible every time he gets something wrong

  • Sloane: Is going to make damn sure you get your gains while you two and stuck together, makes you do pushups, sit-ups, drink plenty of juice, all the weight training your body can handle until you are a muscle factory that can rip hive jaws off, other than that she is actually pretty chill, got a very mom vibe to her, lets you order pizza on your cheat day

  • Petra: Is actually across from Cayde's apartment, is part of Cayde's plana to get you and Amanda to date, called Operation "Exotic Ship", you talk to her from the window now and again and she says how much she misses the dreaming city, you assure her that being here is good too for now.

  • Devrim: You finally stop by for that cup of tea, he has plenty of Monty Python, Black Adder, and other comedy DvDs for you to watch, while also having you do the housework for him and his husband because he knows you Guardians can get it done much faster, you listen to the Archers on the Radio while doing so with your can of Carling and snacking on Pork Scratchings.

  • Saint 14: when you tell him you're going to be living with him for a bit he extends his arms out for a hug in sheer joy he gets to be with his Hero, always has his fridge stocked up with your favorite drinks and snacks, treats you like a god even though you ask him not to, he is a bro for life.

  • Osiris: You wake up one day to see 10 Osiris's in a room together having an argument about how to correctly kill a vex hydra, this happens often and you no longer question the ever increasing amount of Osiris's in the house

  • Brother Vance: You disturbingly find a lot of Osris Fanfics and Posters, think Midorya but for Osiris, this disturbs you greatly and you now are rather afraid of Vance

  • Oryx: Ok so you two are on the Dreadnought, good nice, OOOH you get to use more swords that's always a plu-….wait…. OH MY GOD YOU TWO ARE SHIRTLESS AGAIN WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN WITH YOU TWO AND WHY THE FUCK IS IT RAINING IN A SHIP WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU TWO ALWAYS SHIRTLESS IN THE RAIN

  • Ada-1: The Black Armory forge is a surprisingly nice place to live, a variety of food from Ada's heritages, a nice weapons testing range, access to creating weapons, she even lets you put a few "highly illegal" mods onto her weapons because it's you, she gets increasingly flustered when you're around, calling you a "Baka" whatever that means, and you swear when you fall asleep you can feel a cold metal gently press your cheek.

  • Failsafe: is just as depressed as you are about this whole situation, not much to do on the exodus black besides play funny pre golden age youtube videos to spook Fallen and Werner, you sometimes play battleships even though every time Failsafe gets reminded about the crash and gets upset

  • Spider: Much to your not surprise he sells hard drugs, knockoff Gjallerhorns that explode on use, a Zavala shaped marital aid, a Shaxx shaped marital aid, and you're pretty sure you talked to a Ghost that was forced to watch 1000 years worth of annoying orange and Yo Momma videos.

  • Eva Levante: You make damn sure she's getting her sleep and keeping safe in this Siva Crisis, because she is the Tower's oldest dear and you will all protect her with your light or SO HELP ME GOD I WILL SHOW YOU WHAT SWORD LOGIC REALLY MEANS

  • Xur: Lives is a very surprisingly high rise expensive billion dollar space mansion, it has every pre golden age console, pc, a pool, a pool inside of a pool, he tells you that he made all this money by fencing Strange Coins to tribals who thought they were sacred, a bit of a shitty thing to do Squidward but hey its a hustle, sometimes you have to shoo away the drifter diving into dumpsters

  • Rasputin: Error 404

  • Amanda Holliday: This is it, Cayde and Petra's Gambit is going to pay off, it starts by Cayde saying he's going out to get "Shopping" done and won't be back till 4am, the afternoon starts, you're watching Gundam on Lightflix, you two are sat next to each other, getting closer and closer each time you sit back down from a bathroom break or snack break, till the point where you're practically face to face, over the course of the day you both know you've been dancing around words, playing off "awkward" moments, the kiss scene of G-Gundam plays, and you both look at each other, moving closer and closer, till you can see her eyes and she can see yours, you both close your eyes and go in for the finisher, upon unlocking lips with her and taking your hand out of her short but soft hair, you go in for another kiss, but as soon as you do, the door FLYS open with the force of Oryx after Taco Bell, Cayde is there laughing his Robutt off, Petra is red in the face from laughter and what she just witnessed, you both fly off each other in utter embarrassment, Cayde gives you a big old hug and tells you how this was all part of his Plan to get you two to confess to each other, you're halfway in a mind to strangle him or pat his back in thanks, much to your shock even Little Light was a part of the plan, after the embarrassment ends you all enjoy movies together knowing this is going to be a great quarantine with your now girlfriend and best buddy for life.

  • Crota: Gets angry at his neighbors and barges into their rooms, barges into your room throwing shit everywhere, barges into his own room, barges into the vanguard vault, you tell him to take a Chill Pill Logic Pill, he believes this is a real thing and keeps attempting to use Hive Rituals to summon a chill pill he can consume

  • Shin Malphur: You arrive at his supposed apartment, from the onset it looks beaten up and worn down in disrepair, you think to yourself "How could a man that badass live like this", but this not to your knowledge, is a deception, a test to see if you can cope in the worst environments before you enjoy the greatest, you turn on the TV to watch some TV when you suddenly feel the need to get a snack, you go over to Shin's Freezer and see leftover pizza slices, one half is pepperoni and cheese, the other pineapple, ham, and peppers, you try to decide which one you would like to eat, eventually deciding on a bit of both, just as it has finished cooking, you find it on a plate next to you, which a light breath behind you, you know he's there, he knows you're there, he then says about how you can walk the line between good and evil, and how it is like he is, you sigh deeply and weep softly as he lets you into his real apartment realizing you're going to have to put up with shit like this for months

Read:  With the extension to Beyond Light Launch in Nov, it still doesn't make the Top 5 for longest content releases in the Destiny franchise history.

Source: reddit.com

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