Content of the article: "A Sneaky Sahuagin in a Barrel"
>Be me, Sahuagin Psychic Warrior Fighter (Dagon)
>Be not me, DM, Bearfolk Bard (Winnipeg), Aasimar Cleric (Lee), Lamia Mystic (Smear), and Dragonborn Sorcerer (Iri)
>Have to get in contact with a Wizard so that she could help us heal a sacred tree that was poisoned by Baba Yaga
>Wizard is friend of our "friend" Wiz, a surfer dude-sounding Wizard that flies us around on his soul-powered airship so he knows where's she living
>While we were investigating the tree (and fighting a pissed-off Efreeti), Wiz captured a Doppelganger and tied them to the mast of his ship and was testing its ability to change forms using various people's hair (something that we later learned wasn't so benign as he had collected hair/scales from us to soul-trap us to his airship)
>Set sail to the Wizard's location, arguing with Wiz about the soul-trapping plan along the way
>Touch down outside the city which we soon learned would be problematic to us
>Come across the fat guard captain outside the city walls who instantly takes a dislike to us as we're all some form of magic user and that city banned all magic to the point of having an anti-magic field encompassing the entire city
>After Smear insults the captain for being fat and our various methods of gaining entrance all fail, we leave
>As we all mill about the ship, talking about our predicament with Wiz and my character's retainers, Wiz goes below deck long enough for the Doppelganger mutters that he could help us get into the city if we got it a lock of the guard captain's hair
>After some deliberation, we agreed with the beast and went to work with our plan which mostly involved Dagon's hydration barrel (Sahuagin need to moisten their gills every 4 or so hours or they start to suffocate) as a barrel of food, damn near naked with only climbing gear, natural weapons, and natural armor to keep me company (plus some super suspenseful music)
>Get rolled down the hill towards the gates and the DM has me roll a Deception check to (there's gonna be a lot of checks) see if I cried out when I hit the wall
>Ended up rolling a 3 so I loudly yelled "Shit!" when I hit the doors , alerting the guards on the wall to the barrel
>Guards walk up to the barrel and investigate it, DM asks me to roll a Stealth check to see if I stay hidden but end up rolling a 13 and stay quiet even as the guard stabs a sword into the barrel
>A successful Acrobatics check and a nicked shoulder later, the other guard smacks the stabber and the two carry me into the guardhouse and start carrying me up the stairs (how they're carrying me is beyond me considering I'm in a barrel big enough to hold a 7'5", 250lb hammerhead shark-man plus water)
>Guards suddenly drop me down the stairs and the lid to my barrel falls off, causing them to comment on how empty the barrel is
>DM asks me to roll an Acrobatics check to grab the lid, end up rolling a 13
>Manage to get the lid on unnoticed thanks to a lucky crack of thunder
>Guards continue to carry my heavy ass up the stairs only to get stopped by the captain's assistant who wants to open up the barrel to see what's inside
>Roll a 22 on a Strength to check to keep the lid close, forcing the assistant to shrug and just stab the barrel with a dagger, forcing me to roll another Acrobatics check
>Roll a 1 and end up getting stabbed through my hammerhead (fun fact: that's called a cephalofoil) but roll a 26 Constitution Save so I don't make a sound
>Satisfied, the assistant gives the okay to bring me up to the captain's quarters, who's surprised but happy to see a barrel of what he thinks is food and after getting told that the lid was stuck, turns his back to me to find a prybar
>I quietly take the lid off of the barrel and yank a lock of hair unnoticed thanks to some lucky rolls and decide to try and choke him out but end up rolling a 5, so he breaks out of it
>Now pretty angered/scared, he goes to start calling for the guard when I just starting growling at him in all the languages I know (though I lean pretty heavily into Deep Speech, Aquan, and Common) that he needs rest
>Captain settles on Dagon being a particularly scary-looking Dream Fairy and that I'm here to help him sleep. I tuck him in, blow out all the candles, all that good stuff until he asks me to sing him to sleep. I don't know any nursery rhymes off the top of my head but I do know one song by heart…
>"Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley
>Roll a 21 on a Persuasion check to lull him off to sleep with the power of righteous love music
>With the Captain snoozing, I escape out a window into the now-stormy night
>After meeting up with the Doppelganger, he transforms into the captain, slips a small stone into Wiz's pocket (which Lee promptly throws off into the woods when the Doppelganger isn't looking) and leads us into the city
TLDR: Sharkman sneaks into a city in a barrel and somehow gets out alive using the power of lucky rolls and Rick Astley
- How our sneaky dwarf stealing a hat turned into our cleric being dragged to jail
- Party stole from and killed the guards of a powerful government official. Need to show them that their actions have consequences.
- How to deal with Leomund’s Tiny Hut as a DM (Spoilers for Tomb of Annihilation)
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