Dungeons & Dragons Online

How a hag legit cursed us (COS Spoilers)

(Note: please do not write spoilers for COS in the comments, this is currently an active campaign. If you need to, please write “spoiler” (or something along those lines) as an indicator at the beginning of the comment. Hope you enjoy :-).)

be me, human (secretly changeling) grave cleric

be not me, DM, human phantom rogue, human (way) monk, half-orc berserker barbarian, and Ireena

get our butts handed to us by the Boneshaker hags.

we each lose something: lock of hair from Ireena, courage from rogue and monk, heart from barb (don’t worry, he got better) and victory from me.

keep that last one in mind.

fast forward a few sessions

be in Vallaki, selling “pastries” to local businesses

should be meeting with Ms. Watcher, but you know


particularly, our barb gets a 10 ft ladder from the general store as a joke when we came by them

exit the area

roll a probability dice on a d100 to see what happens during travel

roll a 2

”Next time we roll probability dice, I’m rolling it!” I say

get ambushed by four guard squads of 6 and Izek

demanded to lay down our weapons and surrender

we start doing that…

…but quickly place down the ladder and scamper up to the rooftops

most of my allies make it up safely (opportunity attacks on scale mail, hell yeah), but the rogue is forced to deal with an entire squad.

rogue gets downed, but is stable as the guard group carries her off

try to pull up the ladder, but not before an entire squad got on the roof

group attempts to shove the guards off the roof

barb succeeds, monk almost succeeds, and Ireena and I fail

guard squads start converging on our location and Izek is hurling balls of fire at us

things start getting hairy, so monk books it out of there

things start getting hairy, so barb jUMPS ON IZEK FROM THE ROOF

he actually did pretty well for a while, getting Izek very low, but his frenzy couldn’t keep him conscious forever and he’s captured

meanwhile, Ireena and I decide to book it to the monk

it didn’t go well

Ireena is captured and, surrounded, I briefly consider surrender

but as I remember what deals are left unfinished, the devotion I have to my god, and Certain Backstory ReasonsTM, I disengage after the monk, the guards leaving to capture Ireena

I heal us both up and we head out to the Watcherhaus

we keep traveling across the rooftops, but a probability dice is rolled to see if the guards spot us

we’re spotted by the guards, one squad on the roof, the other on the ground

we fight them off, but when the monk is downed, I run to the edge of the roof

I was the one who pulled up the ladder, so I kept it

I head down, trying to shove the ladder down, but failing due to

I make a mad dash for it, but am knocked unconscious and carried off with the monk

Session end

After the session…

”I can’t believe our dice rolls were so bad!”

”Hey, didn’t (cleric) lose his victory back at the hags

”Ohhh, this must mean this is how it manifests! Now we will suffer no more defeats, right?


“I’d rather die standing than live kneeling” -Veggietales Facts Twitter account


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