Dungeons & Dragons Online

How our sorcerer got the “horse fucker” title.

Content of the article: "How our sorcerer got the “horse fucker” title."

be me, drow bard with a raven familiar

be not me, moon elf druid, human shadow sorcerer, elf wizard, firbolg druid

party decides to call it a night

they all go to the bathhouse

decide not to join them and get a room for myself

wizard conjures a tower and they all stay in

firbold druid: "Wait i forgot to tell drow bard we're here"

sends an animal messenger

I recieve animal messenger

I get told to go talk to firbolg druid

send my raven familiar then polymorph self into giant raven

arrive at tower

peck on sorcerer and moon druid's window

get nothing

peck at firbolg druid's window

get in

can only caw

firbolg decides to spook sorcerer with my presence

sorcerer gets spooked and knee jerk reactions a vitriolic sphere

not wise enough as a raven to see it and counter spell

party takes damage

floor is melted, cieling is melted, 3 floors fucked on that tower

shrug and go back to own inn room

firbolg druid spends the night on the tower's cieling

sorcerer and other druid have no rooms now

they all go to the closest tavern

tavern's all full

sorcerer persuades with a plat to kick someone out and get themselves in

innkeeper tosses in a granny

next day

granny is found frozen to death

druid feels bad and wants to bury

shapeshifts into a horse to carry her out for burial

sorcerer joins

stopped at the gates

asked to explain what's up

sorcerer: "Well I wanted a room for two for the night and the innkeeper tossed her out"

guard sends someone to talk to the innkeeper, he comes back to comfirm it

guard: "So you think you're better than us? And a room for two?"

Sorcerer tries to explain, asks horse to not be horse anymore

horse is now moon elf druid

guard just facepalms and tells them they'll deal with it

back at the tower the firbolg druid and i decide to do a quick shopping trip before leaving

get told by the guards there's a weird pale guy about

get told he also fraternizes with beasts of burden

lose it as i put 1 and 1 together

Source: reddit.com

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