Dungeons & Dragons Online

How to deal with personal problems impacting a game

Hey all. Sorry if this post is a bit out of your paygrade; it just seemed to be the best sub to ask stuff. If anybody has a better sub to direct my question to, please help me out.

Effectively, I play in a few games with a friend who has… really hurt me. Kinda bad. So we've had a sort of "friend break-up" as things are. Pretty recent. As in like, just 2 hours ago recent. She's in several of my tabletop games (it was one of our favorite hobbies), and I was just wondering how to sorta handle this.

For my main game, my pride and joy, my baby, the one campaign I've been trying to run for two years desperately, that she was in, I feel I need to kick her. I'm just unsure as to how to deal with breaking the news to everyone. She's close with a lot of people, this game did already have an awkward kick relatively recently (one that I'm regretting a bit but that might just be some emotional freshness; either way it's not important except for context). A lot of people are friends with her, close friends with her, and I worry that this sort of thing, however necessary it may be, could just taint the whole thing and make it collapse; something I desperately don't want. As I said I've been writing the story for two years (or at least the broad strokes and themes and such; obv I'm adjusting things and avoiding railroading and all that because I know on its own it sounds silly). I just wanted to know how some people would break this news to their friends and manage keeping morale up in a campaign when there are these huge disputes between friends (out of game, I should mention).

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Additionally, I have a friend on the periphery who wanted to ask a question about how to deal with this. I'm just gonna copy paste their text here because they didn't wanna clog the sub with posts about the same dispute.

" Hey all, friend here: My problem is sort of similar. OP and the person she "friend broke up" with are both players in a game I'm about to run. I've never run DND proper before, and the one game I tried to run collapsed in on itself after 2 proper meetings because one of the players broke down crying after one of the meetings. I'm not exactly confident in dealing with the emotional and social conflict that comes with tabletop games.

So, I'm not quite sure what to do here: one player has to go, but I'm not sure whom. OP is honestly who I side with moreso when it comes to the "friend break up" even though I deeply empathise with the other person (it's always so complicated). Moreover, the other person is also the reason I'm even running the campaign in the first place: she's incredibly knowledgeable on 5e, boosted my confidence about the whole thing, and was just generally helpful. Also, due to all of the conflict, she's feeling incredibly victimised, and I feel like kicking her from a game that she's been nothing but helpful for. I'd be an asshole for that. But, I'd also be an asshole for telling OP to go because OP didn't do anything wrong either.

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I don't think reconciliation is possible even though I desperately hope it is. I want to talk to them both about this, but I have a feeling that'll be messy and I need advice either way. Please just help me I just want to run a funny game where my friends get tortured by a fictional government kthxbye "

OP Note: I'm perfectly ok with leaving the latter game btw if it makes it easier for my friend, they just don't feel comfortable unilaterally deciding it due to the reasons given. In case anybody wonders. Just wanted to clarify it.

Thanks all for reading this, looking it over. We both appreciate the help a lot. And if we need to go to a different sub please let us know. Thanks guys.


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