Dungeons & Dragons Online

We did it Patrick, we saved the city

Be a pretty standard albeit spellcaster heavy party

We've got a magic melee man who is some class, basically Sephiroth, bordering on edgy but good-natured pc and very good in combat

Very pure and also very tired/cynical cleric girl, travels with a seal familiar that speaks in UWU

A ranger who eats beans and is frequently absent because his character is chasing beans

A sweet old tiefling woman who is tiny and just has no idea.

And the instigators of the events of tonight's story, a diplomatic corporate sorcerer who gets very rich through legal and corporate things. Name is Archimedes.

Be me, Michi, his aactual pet cat, who needs a special amulet to have normal hit points and a very point witch hat for confidence. All fire spells sorcerer who revels in mischief and destruction, but also being lazy with friends.

An establishing character moment

Archimedes is talking to some pirates that we were planning on beating up and stealing clothing from. Standard stuff.

Michi climbs up sneakily and shoots them with lightning while they're talking.

She finds these people boring, and she hates being bored more than anything.

She inexplicably speaks and threatens to consume their very souls.

We steal pirate clothes to sneak into a bar. Our seal is wearing a cute eyepatch.

Archimedes walks in

"Hello fellow pirates. I heard a loud noise from here and was concerned about you. My fellow pirates."

"Ah, hello fellow pirate. We're fine unless somebody comes in here and casts fireball, incinerating this building."

Archimedes sets Michi down on the floor

Leaves

Everyone aws and pets the cute cat as she smiles and a glimmer of malice appears in her eyes

It's fucked, they're fucked, the building is fucked. The spell went too high.

Bodies are flying out onto the port town, many into the water

Smells kind of good

Archimedes plays hysterical when the pirates say that's the second time your cat has fucked our shit up

Fireball, quickened fireball

We're all just mowing through what's left

These things are below me, I am pacman, and you are not even ghosts, you are all dots

All-out attack of pirates and their captain shows up to tank a fuckload

Teleports away and leaves us with a hydra to fight

Good. The one true God-Empress of flame was getting bored.

Fireball

The fight is getting serious but then we fireball

Oh my god the buildings are all just exploding

We all make its heads explode all at once, it's incredible

Michi watches them burn as they fall through the air like fireworks

Yes. I now know I could kill god if I wanted to. I am satisfied.

The town is saved

Nearly half of the buildings have been destroyed in the conflict

The people are overjoyed that we brought a kaiju to their backyard and blew up their houses along with the mooks

Ended it on a real high note, everything has exploded, the people are happy and Michi may now nap as the bloodlust is finally sated

Source

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