I broke my rule to not kill unless strictly self-defense.

Content of the article: "I broke my rule to not kill unless strictly self-defense."

I grew up with some scavengers in an area east diamond city.
I knew dirty, but civilized life. My parents were ripped apart by
a huge wave of ferals, when i was 12. i get nightmares each times i see the
greenish of a radstorm. after barrely 7 years of having a constant group,
which i learned is a long time outside of a stable settlement,
the scavers that raised me had been attacked by a group of
traffickers. some where killed, my 2. parents had been
enslaved and brought to the far west. they talked about soemthing
like an amusement park. i don't care. i escaped at night and
made my way through the wasteland. this is now again 10 years
later of surivial and moving on.
this guy approached me and tried to talk me into his bullshit,
something about replacing bottlecaps.
I have the strict rule, to only and only kill in sefl-defense –
or if its mutants or traffickers –
but this guy pushed it too far. he was threatening me,
with dangerous people and called me a retard.
in diamond city, i learned that im partially mentally disabled,
through the ferals that ate my parents knocked me on a metal
shelf with my backhead, which i barely survived.
I feel strange about it anyway.
I shouldn't have done it. One thing to survive the commonwealth,
is to stick to your personal rules.
I broke one of mine.
I saved a lot of kind souls with that rule.
I don't know how to move on.
But something in his arrogant face says it was the right thing to do.
The Wasteland is changing me. I thought i could hold on to my
principles. How will the next self-betrayal look like ?
i shoved him into the car to avoid unwanted attention.
maybe he told the truth about his dangerous friends.
But basically he said "you're SO dead" – as i told him i wouldnt fall for his bullshit.
who knows with how many other woman he was "fucking around" before that?
so… time to move on. i need to get some supplies to jamaica plain.
sry parker, if you were a good man. i lost control this time.

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Source: reddit.com

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