Content of the article: "‘Twas the night before patch day"
‘Twas the night before patch day in our post nuclear world,
and not a cryptid was creeping- not even big Earl.
The devs repackaged code from 2011 with care
in the hopes the old servers’ loads could be beared
Meanwhile supermutants cuddling, no longer have dread
because tomorrow‘s damage nerfs will soon spare their soft heads.
Me in insurgents, and Deguerre’s VTU cap
just drank vintage nuka shine to celebrate the patch
When suddenly, groovy turned trippy and arose such commotion
that I almost got sick just from hearing the motion
I parted Grelok’s curtains, and on my C.A.M.P’s lawn i spy:
A piercing crimson color catches me by surprise
Not the usual hue of King Cranberry my mirelurk
What I see through the fog are two great glowing eyes!
Attached to those eyes a body too staunch for a sloth
I knew it at once to be the man of Moth!
So swiftly he flew, I caught just a glance
perched up in a tree on the tallest of plants
He opened his mouth as I wet my pants:
“̴You̡ ͝k̕n̨ow me ̧well ̶as ą ́p͝r̀o͠p̀he̴t҉ ǫf doom̕,
͏ wéĺl he̡ar͠ m͞e ̛no̧w f̢o͏r̷ ̀p͡a̛t̵ch̨ d̀ay com͡es ̷s͞óon҉
I͢ ̛sm̸e͜ll ͠your̴ ̧f͠eaŗ ͜t̢h͡er̀e̢’͝s ͟no doub̛t͠ y͏ou a̴re͟ ńèrv̵o͞u̢s̕
͠ Bugs͜ a̵b̧oųńd,͘ ̀ex̛pensiv͘e̕ perk̴s, ̀and͏ yóur͡ ̧bu҉ild ̷wi͜lĺ ͢b͏e ͜wor̨t̵h҉l͟es̢s̨
͝féar ̨n҉ot̷ ̨va̧u̕lt͘ dwèl͘le͏r̛, ͢fơr̀ ǫnc̛e he̛ed my GOOD n͠e҉ws̀:
͡ Whi̴l͠e̢ t̕hi̕s̡ ga̴m͡e͞ ̢m̵áy ̡break̛ e͡v̛ęŗy͢ ̷w͟e̵e͜k w͏i͘t͏h ͞imp̶unity,̡
͟ ͏n̸o matter ͏wha͏t ͘ḩapp͝ens͢ yo͜u’ll a̡lw҉ay͝s ҉hav̕e t͜his̶ co͞ḿmu̕ni҉t͡y͞.”
With a screech and a hoot he flew up o’er my roof
He scattered moth dust coming down in a swoop
opened his sack full of wendigo’s tooths
and passed me a handful like it was the boof
In that moment I knew he was speaking the truth.
He skittered and scattered and uttered some clicks
He puffed up his wings like a big bloated tick
His message so clear in the way he elaborated
Then quick as my worries he just up and evaporated
Be kind to friends and strangers alike
you’ve read the truth, now pass this light
Finally about to log off, when in the corner of my eye i catch one final sight:
You have contracted The Blight
Happy patch day to all, and to all a good night
- Twas the night before ORIGINSmas…
- ‘Twas the Night Before War Effort…
- ‘Twas the Night Before Scholomance
© Post "‘Twas the night before patch day" for game Fallout.
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