Gaming News

I’m not a gamer, just an addict.

Gaming has been the one hobby I've had all my life. It started with playing Worms with my uncle on his PC and GTA San Andreas on my friend's PSP. I fell in love. Then my mum showed me a Farmville clone browser game called Farmerama. I liked it, but the developer had an another game that they heavily advertised: Drakensang Online. Our computer didn't support Java so I could only play it on my grandma's laptop when I was at her place. I was hooked from the start. I didn't understand how quests worked so I only ran around the starting area and killed mobs with my warrior character. After I got to level 12, even the highest level mobs stopped dropping XP. After about a year of playing I figured out how quests worked. The first time I turned one in and gained thousands of XP points I felt a type of joy I didn't know existed.

My best friend in middle school was a gamer too. He showed me this thing called 'Minecraft'. We had no money so we played on servers on a cracked version that must've been like 10 patches behind the version out at the time. SkyPVP and Hunger Games were our thing. I get a bit teary remembering how fun it was. My friend spent a few months in his home country during the summer and he came back with forbidden knowledge. A cousin of his there showed him a game called League of Legends. We started playing together, marvelling at how strong Master Yi was since he could kill a full wave with his Q. We had our first big argument over League too. My friend bought Lissandra first while I bought Yasuo first. I insisted he should go top but he refused and wanted to go mid since this 'Faker' guy always played Lissandra there. My friend was more important than mid lane so I became a Thresh main. I literally learned to speak English from League tutorials on youtube, I'm not kidding. I nearly failed Chemistry in 8th grade because I played so much League.

After 8th grade I went to a different high school and my best friend and I drifted apart. My life also got much, much worse. My only escape became online gaming. Leauge of Legends, Overwatch, Counter Strike, these type of games. As much as I played them though, my rank always stayed average. It wasn't about improvement, it was about escape. Later on I also figured out that buying microtransactions gave me a type of high I couldn't get elsewhere. I downloaded games just to buy some stuff, feel alive for a bit then delete them, it was like smoking. I must've spent 1500 dollars on that vice.

Around a year ago I fell in love for the first time. I opened up to her about everything: my degenerate spending habits, how I hated online games and loved them at the same time. How the longest and probably only single player game I ever completed was Portal 2 which took me about 5 hours while I spent thousands on doing the same thing over and over again online just to not be forced to think about life.

She helped me. She kept me accountable and also encouraged me to open up to my parents about my microtransaction addiction. I quit every online multiplayer game except for Fortnite. Somehow I could play that without getting addicted. I bought Hollow Knight and started playing it with my girlfriend and also Factorio. It's so much fun. I've also explored other hobbies, music, sports, stuff like that. I love gaming now even though I play a lot less than I used to. I still struggle with a tendency to want to buy too many games, but I'm a lot better than I used to be.

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