Monster Hunter World

Not Even Dodogama Who Eats Petrified Shit Would Stomach the Dungpile of These HH Changes

No fucking intro, I'm already worried I'll hit the character limit.

Left Hook: I'm legitimately impressed they normalized this with Right Ho- wait no it's still noticeably slower. Because Left Hook ALWAYS HAS TO BE WEAKER THAN RIGHT HOOK, IT'S FUCKING SCIENCE. At least it was actually buffed, I guess – too bad it's made entirely irrelevant by Perform.

Forward Slam: Same motion value as World and still middling attack length. But now it can further marinate in its mediocrity since it's largely replaced by Crush. Crush, for the uninitiated, is Forward Slam's Chad older brother that finally decided to visit his hometown from college for the holidays to ensure that his little brother Forward Slam continues to eat shit and dirt. Why use Forward Slam when Crush deals more damage and can rotate you on a whim? A VERY slight speed advantage that's hardly noticeable isn't enough to cut anything into FS's corner.

Multi-Crush: Do you know what was on the top of my wishlist for Hunting horn? It sure wasn't an attack that is basically a Hilt Stab followed by a Flourish that only generates one note. And now, having a 2 point increase in motion value isn't going to save this atrocity of an attack. May have been fun if it wasn't FUCKING locked behind other attacks and had jus a smidge more scaling. You know you're in fucking trouble if you are being edged out in damage by Forward Slam.

Right Hook: Welcome to Capcom's favored child, the A button. It practically lives in its own speed tier when it comes to HH attacks. Would've been great if we had a counterpart to this move that worked from the left side, but unfortunately no such attack exists. Would've also been nice to have the option to FUCKING USE IT AFTER A PERFORM. But nah, being able to access every attack on a whim is too complicated – never mind the incoherent mess that is the HH combo tree now that requires a 500 word paragraph to accurately explain.

Crush: Second best move in the HH's arsenal. If you aren't spamming Crush, you're doing 10-20% less damage. Fun isn't it?

Kick Up: If you told me Capcom found a way to make Hilt Stab even less relevant than it mostly was, I would've been skeptical. But luckily I'm not skeptical, I'm just proven wrong at this point. It's such a niche use that's only available after two attacks you don't want to be using anyway. Neat.

Backwards Slam: Man, you got a major buff. Which really fucking sucks because you're so hard to use anymore. We can't turn on a point and throw out as a stronger, more time committed Forward Slam because turning speed or input lag or some bullshit. Nor can we utilize you in anyway because you don't combo off of anything. Then again, it kind of fucking doesn't matter since Perform does more damage than you anyway. Sorry man.

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Overhead Slam (Classic): Here's a juicy plot twist: This attack is NERFED from World. The start up swing has a whopping, OP motion value of 6 now, down from 14. The followup is more powerful at least, going from 39 up to 46… But we still lost a point in motion value because reasons? Like with Backwards Slam, no point in doing less damage for a longer commitment window – just use Perform.

Overhead Slam (New Variant): This was genuinely surprising. Overhead Slam has a new variant that actually gives the initial swing its old MV of 14 back. A BUFF?!? TO AN OLD HH ATTACK? This can actually compete with the lord and savior that is Perform… buuuut it's only a 1% increase in total damage and you have to have some fucking precision positioning because this variant is only after a Multi-Crush or Crush attack – which makes its initial swing INCREDIBLY UNRELIABLE (thus negating the point of using this attack) because the hitbox? You ready? This is pretty fucking funny.

The hitbox is below your hunter's waist and to the left. Yup. The only condition you could possibly get the most out of this attack is when the monster's face is below your waist. You know, like it always is(n't).

Melodic Slap: Apparently this one follows Overhead's behavior and has a neutral and Post-Crush variant. I hadn't done any testing because this thing does fuck all damage. But I'm ok with that, since it does a lot of Stun damage – HOLY SHIT? DID CAPCOM ADD A DEEP AND MEANINGFUL DECISION INTO THE HUNTING HO- no, no they didn't. You know why? Because the entirety of the attack suffers from the "Variant Overhead" problem OF HAPPENING ENTIRELY UNDERNEATH YOUR HUNTER'S WAIST! IF I CAN'T FUCKING HIT THE HEAD OF THE TRAINING DUMMY WITH THE SETTING ON "LOW", THERE'S A GODDAMN PROBLEM.

USELESS BY FUCKING DESIGN. I WANT TO USE YOU, I DO – BUT WHY DO I HAVE TO MISS SO MUCH OF THIS ATTACK JUST BECAUSE I'M SMALLER THAN THE MONSTERS I'M FIGHTING?!?

Double Swing: Legitimately forgot about this because it's legitimately garbage. Take Crush, but make it do a horizontal double swing that doesn't do enough damage for the time commitment while also having a very unintuitive movement arc. Also if you for some reason elect to use this after a Backwards Slam, you can't move yourself at all strangely. It's straight backwards for you in that one case. Super weird.

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Perform: The one-hit wonder for the weapon. If you have the opportunity to attack and you don't use Perform, odds are you just missed out on damage. This hits way to hard for its average time commitment. If you were to take side-by-side measurements of various 2 and 3 button combos, anything that DOESN'T have Perform is straight up 20-30% less damage. When I say that the HH is braindead, is because your optimal play is literally rotating between zR and A. You might hit X and X+A to stack a Trio, but if those buffs aren't worth it – you just can't justify using other attacks.

(Not) Magnificent Trio: "Do you like lengthy animations that in no way, shape, or form legitimize its usage? No? … Shit." -Someone at Capcom, apparently.

Infernal Melody: I would love this more if I had the chance to hit with it more. Being locked behind your choice of two rather lengthy animations (Trio or Slide Beat) makes it very hard to use without just whiffing on purpose… Or eating a shit sandwich delivered express via Iceborne levels of aggression. It's just a nice throwback to the inconvenience of trying to Encore in World/Iceborne, really. Why remove a problem a weapon has with functioning when you can just dress it up nicely?

Slide Beat: … I actually don't have any complaints here. I'm just as surprised as you are. A situational tool that serves a specific purpose without overshadowing any other part of the kit. Wow, imagine if every attack was designed with that sort of thinking.

Earthshaker: Why do we have a move that takes 6.5 seconds to pull off? It's like Infernal Melody where the length of time makes it largely impractical. The good news is that the camera zooms in closely when you whiff it because the monster moved or was flinched out of your range, so you can see your soul leaving your body out of disappointment just like a GS main! At least it is better damage than our combos and can lead to some sweet moments if the monster leaves the range AFTER being hit by the start up.

Bead of Resonnance: You know what I love most? An unnecessarily long animation for a shitty payoff. Sure, it solves the age long issue of HH's needing to have Attack Up – but there is NO goddamn reason this should take 5 seconds to do. Especially when the bead is created within the first second! This move has no motion values to be proud of, even the extra soundwaves are the neutered version of the one from Perform. With the insane amount of mobility across the board and a punitive range of 2 base dodge rolls, like hell this thing is going to stack up any sort of damage to make up for the lost time it took to place it (assuming you didn't eat shit for trying to put it down to begin with).

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This is also ignoring the fact that so many other weapons have Silkbinds that are quick and zippy to use with much better payoffs or utility that's more than "something this weapon should just innately have".

There. I'm done. After 130 hours with about 300 HH hunts and 2 Greatsword hunts, I put Rise back in its case. I'm going back to Iceborne if I ever get the hunting itch. Whatever, "I got my $60.00 so I got nothing to complain about lulz!1".

We'll see how the next game shapes up – Rise has done nothing but implement systems that slowly drain me of any excitement. The only way they could hope to rope me back in is if they add Namielle or something interesting monster that really catches my attention (by god if you post something about a leak I will punch you through the internet – if someone cared about leaks, they would look for them. I still remember Oroshi Kirin being leaked for World, but that was probably a COVID19 casualty).

I hadn't even bothered to try the Apex Mizutsune quest (being the only unfinished quest I have at this point), and I don't think I will. I have absolutely nothing to gain from doing something I know I can do that will only serve to frustrate and annoy me in the process.

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